Top Signs He’s Not Into You

Is the guy you like playing you hot and cold?

Is he really interested or is he just leading you on?

Here are the top signs that he’s NOT into you.

If any of these sound familiar then you need to get as far away from this guy as possible.

Let’s talk about the subtle (and not so subtle) signals that men display when they’re not really interested. These signals are pretty common and since they happen at an unconscious level, he can’t hide them.

First off, it’s easier to tell when he does like you than when he doesn’t. I always say that a mixed signal is a signal in itself.

What I mean is if he flirts with you and then disappears or he calls you all the time and then stops suddenly then these are signs that he is actually not sure how he feels about you or whether or not he wants to pursue you.

Good thing there are plenty of ways you can tip the scales in your favour and get him to choose you once and for all. Keep watching and I’ll go into more detail about exactly what to do in this situation.
That said, there are a few signals that only have one clear meaning: he’s just not into you. So if you’re wondering whether or not you two are meant to be, consider these signs.

1. He’s takes forever to respond

Plenty of women ask me what it means when a guy never texts them back. Think of it this way–which people in your life do you leave on read, or simply forget to text back? I’m guessing they’re not people you’re extremely interested in talking to.

The same goes for men. When a guy is into you, he’ll text back sooner rather than later. If he doesn’t respond at all it’s a sign he’s losing interest in you.

2. He only hits you up late at night

There’s a type of guy who only wants to talk to you after the sun sets. No, I’m not talking about vampires. This is the type of guy who isn’t really into you. Is he interested in flirting? Most likely. Does he want a booty call? Definitely. But does he want to really get to know you better? Probably not. This is the difference between a man who likes you and a man who just wants sex.

3. He never takes you on a real date

Despite what many guys would have you believe, there’s no real excuse for him not to take you on a date. If you’re “hanging out” instead of having a night on the town, this is a sign that he’s not interested in making an effort and isn’t truly interested in you.

RELATED: How To Attract A Man

You know how guys will put in so much effort to be romantic in the beginning and start slacking once they’ve won your heart? Well what do you think happens when they start at Dominos and netflix? That’s right, it’s only downhill from there. Steer clear or you’re going to end up with Little Caesars and Crackle.

If he did want something serious with you, he’d show up and sweep you off your feet at least once.

4. He’s not sending signals

Instead of looking for signs he’s not into you, try looking for signs that he is.

Does he flirt with you, find reasons to spend time with you and hang on your every word? This is a great indicator that he’s interested or at least wants to get to know you more. The absence of any sort of these signals is a sign that he’s not so interested.

That said, many men are nervous around women who they’re interested in. If you make him nervous this is actually a good sign so keep your eyes out for this fine distinction.

5. He looks at other women

This one is huge. I’m not saying men won’t continue to look at attractive women, even if the two of you are in a serious relationship, but early on he’s going to be trying his best to make sure that you never see him do it.

When they’re interested, men want to show you that you’re the only one on their mind, whether or not that’s true. This means if he’s ever told you that he’s interested in anyone else, then he’s probably not interested in you.

6. He never interacts with you on social media

If he seems to be in everyone’s DM’s but yours, this is a sign that he’s not into you. Does he watch your stories? Like your photos? He doesn’t have to be responding with fire emojis to be interested but lack of engagement means lack of interest.

This signal only counts if he’s frequently online so make sure to creep his profile before jumping to conclusions. But if he’s an influencer and he’s interested, then he’ll be trying to influence you.

7. He doesn’t ask you questions

If he’s interested then he finds you interesting. This means he’ll be asking you questions to find out more about you. He wants to know your likes and dislikes, your family, and your opinions so he can see if you two are a good match.

He’ll also use that information to get closer to you. If he only talks about himself then that means he’s more interested in showing off.

If you’re still not sure one way or the other then you’re in luck. Here’s my secret: all you need to do is ask him questions and listen to what he has to say.

If he knows that you’re interested in his thoughts, it will go a long way to making him interested in you.

RELATED: Make A Man Fall In Love

Men love to talk and if you can learn to listen, he’ll be yours. I’m not saying you need to be silent. In fact, active listening means that you need to be receptive and respond, but focus on listening rather than volunteering information.

This works in several ways: it shows him that you care, it lets him take the lead in the conversation, and because you’re not sharing too much, it’s a subtle way of playing hard to get. Small talk really can be the start of something big.

Lucy Goldman

Lucy Goldman is a women's dating coach and commitment expert. She's a staff writer at LoveLearnings, and host of LoveLearnings TV on YouTube.