How To Make A Guy Open Up Over Text

We all love the strong silent type but some guys are like a brick wall.

Tired of talking to yourself?

Here’s how to make men open up and get to know them over text.

Make Him Open Up Over Text

So stop me if this sounds familiar. You’ve met a guy you really like but talking to him is like pulling teeth.

You need to get him to open up so you can move things forward. Well you’ve come to the right place. I’m going to cover six ways to get a guy to open up that work on even the most stoic of men.

Be patient

You have to realize that many people just aren’t that comfortable communicating via text and this can be a difficult barrier to overcome. These are the guys who say they “suck at texting” and often won’t reply to your messages at all. My best advice here is don’t take it personally, and don’t push.

Often women will try to get a guy to share everything right away and this can lead to him shutting you out completely. So slow it down and tread carefully.

…hello?

You should know that he’s probably like this with everyone and the fact that he’s willing to try is a good sign. You’ll be able to make a connection eventually, it’s just going to take some time to make him fall in love with you.

Be silly

This is the best advice I can give you when trying to get a guy to open up and make him want you. At first glance, the idea that being silly can make a guy open up might not make sense but trust me, it really does work.

You see, people often clam up because they’re afraid to say something wrong or get embarrassed. If you can show him that you’re not afraid to be silly, then he’s going to be more comfortable saying whatever comes into his head without a filter.

I just this pic of you, so cute!

There are a million ways to be silly over text, you just have to find the one that works for you. It could be using a lot of emojis, cracking stupid jokes or sending embarrassing photos.

If you’re not typically a silly person, don’t force it. Just try to be open to having fun, playing along with jokes, and stop taking this whole thing too seriously.

Be vulnerable

When you’re asking a guy to open up, you’re asking him to be vulnerable. The best way to get this result is to be vulnerable yourself. Open up to him about your hopes, your dreams and your biggest fears. If a guy knows that you’re willing to confide in him, he’s more likely to do the same.

I’m really happy I met you…

Basically, don’t be afraid to get real. Stop showing him the version of yourself that’s polished and perfect and let him see the real you.

Ask questions

Asking questions is an invitation to open up. I’d advise you to keep these questions casual and weave them naturally into conversation. Understand that not all of these will lead somewhere interesting but it just takes one spark to reveal something unforgettable. Here are some questions you can ask a guy to get him to open up:

What were you like as a kid?

Where did you grow up?

Why do you get out of bed in the morning?

If you had all the money in the world, what would you do with your time?

Where is your happy place?

The list could go on and on. The real bonding comes from the back and forth these questions inspire.

Gain his trust

Unfortunately there’s no silver bullet here. You’ll be able to gain his trust with time and consistency. Make sure that you always keep your word and be true to him.

I’m sorry to hear that. I’m here for you if you need me.

This means making him a priority and showing him that you’re interested in him for more than just his looks or his money. If you can do this effectively then he’s going to open up to you.

You’ll know you have his trust when he’s comfortable talking to you about anything, without holding anything back. True openness comes with comfort and chemistry and those are things you just can’t fake. Building trust is the best way to stop him from pulling away.

Share secrets

This is a great way to make a guy open up to you. If he knows that you’re opening up he’s more likely to do the same. Don’t overuse this tactic or you could come across as a gossip and always make sure that the information you share couldn’t get anybody in trouble.

Did you hear that Greg and Gina broke up? I heard he has a secret family in Vermont.

Maybe tell him about some bit of ancient history about your friend group. If you can share some information he truly doesn’t expect, he’s going to want to know what more you have hidden, and he’ll know that to learn more, he’s going to have to open up and be honest with you. Try it.

Lucy Goldman

Lucy Goldman is a women's dating coach and commitment expert. She's a staff writer at LoveLearnings, and host of LoveLearnings TV on YouTube.